Confidence is key. We’ve heard these saying many times before. “Oh, just be confident and it’ll work out.” Or perhaps something like, “My confidence got me through it.” But where does that confidence come from? How do we get it? This might come as a surprise but I used to be an incredibly shy young girl. But if I did something, I was confident in my abilities. I want to share four ways to be more confident and I hope this helps you hold your head up high and put some pep in your step. Some of these came to me from more than a decade of figure skating, my time competing in pageants and of course, the time I’ve been working as an adult. I’m still young and have a lot to learn but I hope these will help you.
“Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change.”
Shannon L. Alder
1. Just Do It
The founders of Nike really knew what they were doing when they came up with their slogan. At the risk of sounding like a bad sports announcer, you will miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take. Might as well take some to up your chances. Whether it’s at work or in your personal life, if there’s something you want to do, just do it. This will most likely be terrifying but the more you try, the easier it’ll be. By simply “doing it” you open the door to success, which will build more confidence in you. I didn’t know for sure I was going to win Miss Nebraska USA, but I knew I had a chance. If I never competed, I never would have won and I never would have gone on to become the first Vietnamese woman to compete at Miss USA.
Another thing to remember is done is better than perfect. Especially if you’re going to miss the deadline or miss the opportunity. You might get reprimanded if you don’t do something perfectly but you will definitely get scolded if you don’t do it on time or don’t do it at all. Would you not complete a project at work because you don’t think it’s absolutely stellar? Believe in your value, your skill and just get it done. This attitude will lead to success, which will bring you more confidence. Having this attitude is the most important out of the four ways to be more confident.
2. Talk to yourself Positively
Having a good relationship and being kind with yourself is going to do wonders for your confidence. We all work to be kind to one another but what about ourselves? Would we say the things we say to ourselves to another person? Constructive criticism is great. But saying “Oh, I could have approached this project from a different perspective and included these points” versus “That was a terrible perspective and these bullet points are off target” is very different. Did you now that for most people, 77 percent of self-talk is negative? Let’s change this! It’ll take time but take note of when you say something negative to yourself. Find a way to rephrase it and say something positive in addition. Don’t forget to celebrate every win. Being able to get satisfaction out of each day will bring you confidence.
3. Distance Away from Debbie Downers
There’s a Vietnamese saying about how being next to ink makes you dark and being next to light will make you shine. Take note of who you surround yourself with. Does your inner circle support you and lift you up? Do they celebrate your successes and encourage you? Or do they try to steer you away from trying something new? Surrounding yourself with these people can suck the life out of you and if not that, definitely your confidence. On the contrary, being with friends who are positive and challenge you will increase your confidence. I honestly believe this. My group of friends are all incredibly supportive and push me to be better. If you’re looking to make new friends, try BumbleBizz, going to young professionals networking events and just saying “hi” to people out and about. You’re sure to find good people.
4. Consistency is Key
I put this one as the final tip of the four ways to be more confident because you’ll need a little extra “umph” for this one. I truly believe confidence comes from being prepared. When I used to figure skate, if my practices leading up to the competition weren’t great, I’m pretty sure I knew how the competition was going to go. However, if they were strong, I felt awesome going into the competition, even if I was injured. At work, I knew if I had a bunch of breaking news live shots under my belt, I could do the next one well. Practice doesn’t make perfect, it makes permanent. This was one of the best lessons figure skating taught me. If you practice something wrong, you’re ingraining that into your brain. But if you practice something right, you’re on the right track to success.
I hope this post with four ways to be more confident helps you! There are quite a few ways to gain confidence but these four things are what help me. I hope they inspire you to “just do it” and achieve the success you’re meant for in your life.